Reaching Out, Sorting Out

First, let me say I am always astounded when I come back to this blog and see comments. My thanks to those who posted below. And my apologies for bringing up the old business with Hotspur, and for suggesting that I would have handled things with less decorum, or whatever I said.

Would I have? The one time I was a second in actual dual negotiations (and Caledon really does not duel, one famous haiku example as the exception)....I was new to Caledon, and though there had been hurts and history on both sides of the conflict that I did know, I did all I could in my power, working with Major Margulis (at the time) to achieve resolution without conflict. This is the role of seconds until the Field is taken anyway; the issue came to apologies and all was well.

And H is right in his post. What greater good would be served? The actual history of duelling, especially the deadly duels (pistols did not help) is one of utter idiocy; a man with a mind no less extraordinary than Alexander Hamilton (though he and I would not agree on everything, he was brilliant and deeply influential to our democracy nonetheless) was laid out and left behind his widow over his god damned "Honor," the word he himself used in the letter he wrote his wife before the match.

And not to get heavy on anybody here, but how can Tele, and his typist, claim to be a Christian (though of the liberal variety....as in pro gay marriage, "low" view of scripture, Episcopalian, orthopraxy over orthodoxy type) and not forgive his enemies when it is possible?

Oh, before I forget, my apologies to the Merry Widows....I made an appt. with them which I still do not remember making (though I would not doubt my Ward at all in this regard). The nature of the appt? Chuckles. Let us keep that a mystery.

I need to talk about an incident last night, and while I have removed this blog from my in world profile, my full avatar name is here and any know who me in world can google it in a blip. (I don't think one would get many other hits with the name my avatar has...) So, I approach this very carefully. But I am home alone all weekend, my wife and son out of town...and I need to talk. And while I may not be active in Caledon currently, I damn sure know where to go when I need to reach out and talk like this: my Caledon (past or present) blog audience. My Gorean friends may find this blog, but I know no one there well enough to sort this out with...and I trust the general collective consciousness of the Realm of the Rose, if that makes any sense.

Oh, I am very sad. Sad and I must be careful of "outing" information here I should not. A few of you will know who I am talking about. Most won't, though.

I have an Very Old Friend, let us call him vof; one of the very first I met in sl, and one who was very close to me in my old Gorean sim. He is surely in the top three or four people in sl I actually and truly care about in rl too. Even when we do not interact much, I simply love him and think he is a fantastic role player. He has had difficulties in his rl lately which I will not discuss, and with is PC, and we have not been in world much. But last night, very late, he came to visit me in my new City.

And he came in full Gorean mood.

There are many pieces to Gor, and it must be remembered the role play in sl, anything that goes by the name Gor, is drawn from a series of hack sci fi novels by a professor who was playing with a number of themes (I say this, having read all of two of the books, with effort). But one theme, surely, is dominance, male over female, male over male...in the real world that occurs all the time; in the workplace, in sports, not uncommonly in the bedroom (the woman's hands held down during sex from time to time, with her consent....the same woman who during the day might be anything but submissive....Gor is about that kind of male/female submission; not the kind we see in fundamental Christianity, say).

In general, I find such sexual domination and subordination likely harmless for most. For some, these themes define their sexual lives, and I have no comment to make on that. I do not know enough about it.

The other thing I would like my (gentle) readers to keep in mind is the kind of dominance activity we see in dogs, or in the wild, with wolves. Put sexual submission and that kind of alpha dog behavior together, and you have a feeling for what is most of Gor.

The funny thing is, I'm not really into either of those things, in world or out? What am I doing in Gor? Finding Brotherhood, combat, and fun role play which for me remains sex free. Does that make me less Gorean? Sure. Do I care. Nope. Not unless I am criticized or asked to leave my City for it, which has never happened; at which point I would point out to whatever avatar was criticizing me that I remain chaste in world because I have an ACTUAL WIFE WHO LOVES ME in the fucking real world, and if you cannot support that over role play in the cartoon zone, you can fuck off, and in that role play, Odin help you if I lay you out then. No, everyone in my new City has been cool on this issue. They promoted me too damned fast, I think from reading my profile, which means I owe the Duchess another favor...my knighthood status elsewhere may have had impact there; who knows.

Okay, enough of that.

Now, I was also promoted quickly because I know the melee weapons well: spear and blade and above all axe. Especially in an arena setting. For let me tell you, in the open woods, with multiple fighters, and weapons switching from bow to blade and everyone running like mad and numbers often uneven...it ain't the arena anymore.

So, back to my narrative (sorry for the Moby Dick type excursion)...last night my vof, someone whose heart I truly love, someone whom I have spoken to in actual voice a number of times, showed up at my City. And he in full alpha male motif....different than I had seen him before. In short, our Ubar, or King, was there and while vof and I sparred in the Arena (and I adjusted to his style again, and began to beat him and not just get beat) my Ubar, impressed, asked if I would step out so he could spar with the vof. Sure, I said. With the Ubar was a girl under his care, a slave or bond maid, who he explained to my friend right off when he asked about girls was white silk, or virginal and not sexually available. I do not know this girl, I have never hung out with the Ubar before he is so far above me in rank, and I do not and did not know if she, like me, had merely chosen that state for her rp or is merely "in training" awaiting her first experience. So, while I was in the Arena with somebody else (not from my City, but an ally) I could hear Vof kind of rankling with the Ubar about her; nothing serious, but the Ubar was making himself clear. I, of course, had introduced Vof in the utterly highest possible terms. And this was not some City he and I wandered into in sl Gor; this is now my City (one another member of my prior sim, one I did not know well, completely insulted in IM when he asked me to join another Northern sim....Fuck Fina is what he said....I drew the line quickly with that man; he was the First Axe, but in the one tourney I fought in there, he fell to mine).

Anyway, so I held my ground well with Vof. The Ubar, unused to axe and walking combat (as opposed to running) did not do as well, though he took him down once or twice, fact is, Vof was smoking him pretty good. And when I went into the Arena with another man present, an ally of my City but not a City member, again, a man I know can take me down with a bow in the woods, I man I have fought side by side with against outlaws in the forest (and watched us be the last two standing....it was not my bow that did so well there, I assure all, for I suck at bow) I beat him with the spear handily. The really ranked fighters of my City were not there, the First, the Second, the Lt.

Anyway, everyone was quite impressed with Vof, as fighter but also as role player. He was different, and I think that is because of what is going on in his rl which I will not say anything about here. But he was absolutely dominating, like an animal, this entire group; subtly, saying little, but it was simply happening. When one of the men took out a horn helmet, similar to his, he stepped over and stood right in the (by comparison) puny man's face and began to ask him about the North. All the while in this wonderful Northern accent he has invented. It was funny, and I was okay with all so far. But when he walked over to the white silk girl, the one wearing the Ubar's own name in her tag, and rp'd pushing her legs apart (white silk girls kneel with their legs together in what is called "tower," while red silk (sexually available girls, and that can be restricted to one lover or to the whole world, whatever the girl wants) sit with their legs wide apart, in nadu. That nadu pose is important in the novels as it allows the men to see...well, okay, this is a Caledon blog but you get the idea.

Anyway, he tried to push her legs apart so he could "see" her better. I was standing right there. He even said something about, now that the Ubar is distracted....but clearly in his hearing. It came damned close to a combat challenge to the Ubar himself, and I was standing there, a sworn Guard of the City, even to me. I can say if any other non-Finian had attempted such a thing, I would have stepped in immediately and demanded he cease; if he did not, I would have drawn down on him right then. It is, frankly, my job. And again, being honest, I did not know if the girl was rejecting sexual rp in world as I do, or simply waiting to be "opened." But those who know me begin to understand how intense this became for me, and how quickly.

I went into IM and told the girl to keep her legs together, as the Ubar has commanded her. And then my Vof goes into IM and tells me he does not think much of my City, its Ubar, its Warriors, or its girls. He insults the south, as I recall, something I get sick of hearing from Northern men I consider my friends. In short, while Vof respects me and my "Steel," he did not think much of the Ubar and was pushing that point.

Now, the funny thing is, the girl said she was okay to me in IM. And when right after this, when I began to talk back to him in IM and he simply poofed, she actually wrote me and said...awwww, I was hoping for some actual rp. Sighs. So, apparently, she was in fact charmed or at least okay with my friend the alpha wolf. I, however, was not okay with the insult to my Ubar, nor to my City, nor, by default, to me.

So I tp'd home to Caledon and we went into it in the IM. And it fucking sucked. It sucked. I mean it hurt. I heard all about him finding his Inner Jarl, about how dominance of the female by the male is the natural order, etc. Again, I think these points are accentuated by difficult circumstances in his rl at the moment, but I was not really impressed at the time. He even cited a past instance of a rl lover whose submission he "saw;" I had to remind him that relationship has ended. Anway, it got the point where he did not actually call me out, but he said he was ready to fight me over this, that he was pissed and ready for a good fight.

Oh, that hurt like shit.

And so I did the best thing I could: I got out of rp mode. I called him by his rl name. I reminded him I had never spoken an unkind to him or to anyone about him. And that if he feels like a fight, I can give him a list of names of rp assholes I have run into already (none who live in my City). Why fight his Salt Brother (the highest bond in the North)?

That, finally, after too many very bad minutes, did the trick. Stepping out of the rp and telling him how much I cared about him. The man who one minute earlier was ready to face me, right then, on any ground in a fight to the death (and in Gor, we could have done it in a blink, right in that arena...and if he had lost, there would have been consequences; if he had won, the men of my City would likely have hunted him down and hung his hide from the City wall...sorry, but that is must my guess). That man who was raging pissed and ready to fight me suddenly tells me he loves me. And I told him I loved him, and have always said so.

So, it ended then, too late, 3 a.m. my time, far from resolved, but done for the time being. I do not expect to see him in my City anytime soon, though I would like to see him spar some of the better fighters just to prove the point...an ethic, a rule which uses skill with force to achieve what one desires (Steel is the currency of the Warrior and with it he purchases what he wishes....from the novels) will eventually lead to going up against one who is better than you are, or against more than one...and you will lose. No one wins every time. He would in fact admit this, I think, and accept his defeat. But he truly believes he has gone complete Gorean now, at the core of who he is...and I do not know what lies in our future as friends. We have not yet spoken about any of this since then and I have not been in world. This post (hence the reaching out) is my attempt to sort out my own head and feelings before I go back into the world of notecards and open chat.

Then, concluding, all see why I feel bad about what I said in the post below. What do challenges among actual friends solve in rp? Nothing. Now, against an aggressive enemy in the rp, that is different.

But the fact is I like my new City, I have fun there, I have met what I think are great guys (and a number of whom can lay me out most times, and Vof and I fought about even last night) and the fact is Fina, and my continent in general, is considered not Gorean enough by many, or, the famous phrase, Disney Gor, because we allow rp with women avatars (panthers, even, oh holy shock, female outlaws). The novels are in fact not consistent about armed women (I only know this because of the constant arguments one hears about this, where texts from the books are used) in whether Gorean women are simply "weak as 12 year old boys" or in fact do show up as armed outlaws and fighters in spots in the novels. And in the two books I read, there is a constant tug in the text between what is Gor and what Gor should ethically be, what the protagonist, one from Earth, thinks about all the violence and sexual slavery around him. Slavery which is sometimes loving, sometimes merely brutal. Fact is, Norman does not have the talent to provide a consistent vision regarding such complicated themes, imho. Fact is, the Warrior code in the books is fantasy-embraced by men and boys, most of whom will never fight anyone in the real world and know the real terror and actual result of violence (I said most, not all); and the dominance sexual scenes were written for fantasy sexual stimulation, and I would wager, mostly result in readers dominating nothing but their own weenies for some fun self release (and hey, I'm a guy here...I know how it is to be a guy, especially a young guy). To try to embrace the Gor model as an actual rule of life....no one does that even though many claim to be rl Gorean. I hear that all the time...I am Gorean! the real deal! Both worlds? Oh yeah? I do not think so. There are guys in fact living something close to that. But they're not reading Norman. They are warlords in fucking Afghanistan, killing and raping at will. Etc.

But I cannot say how much the events of last night hurt! I have cried over them. I woke up this morning hurting. It may be he and I can exchange apologies and move on. I have to admit, what he was doing was in fact very "Gorean." And when I told him I would have had to step in and defend the girl, he admitted that was true. He never insulted me personally. But he insulted my Ubar and City, etc., and I found that very painful. Oh, when I told him that I was hurt, that turned the conversation too. He did not mean to hurt me, he said.

Shit.

I do not sleep well when my rl is out of town, and I am tired now. Two nights in world way too late, way too late, and I have much to do this weekend anyway. I may go back in world today, don't know. Likely, some, I will.

So, there it is my friends. I think I kept confidences as best I could and told my side of the story; used "I statements" as they say in therapy. I think this guy is a great guy; I think playing alpha male with human men has some benefits and can surely be fun in world (I do not think I was ever good at it rl though I did a lot of martial arts, and it actually made it hard for me to date, I think....but then I was afraid of women to boot) but alpha wolf style can only go so far! Most women want a guy who is strong but also sensitive. Who makes them feel protected, but also is tender and controls his temper. Whatever. I don't know what they want. I continue to try to figure out what my wife, and we have been together a dozen years, wants and needs via my own thick headed skull.

One thing I do know she would want is my own chastity in world. Even just a cartoon world. And that is why I keep to it, even though that fact now seems known all over my sim...that part of my profile has been read, anyway.

My love to all. Including Vof who does not read this blog or have this link (to my knowledge, but hey, this is the internet). Perhaps I simply over reacted. Am not Gorean enough myself. I have never pretended to be anything but whom I am.

I will note, I have seen my Ubar go out and challenge an outlaw to single combat, a man whose skill he did not know, when he had a half dozen warriors who would have backed him up (he beat the man down until he fled with low meter). He is a strong leader, in my opinion, and I have seen him be just as Gorean as my friend in his way. A dangerous and bloody man to cross. But the last thing I wanted was a Friend I invited to visit getting into that kind of mayhem with an Ubar I barely know but am sworn to fight for. Vof can play alpha wolf anyplace he wishes, but not in my sim. And truth is, had it come to that, I do not think it would have gone well for Vof in the long run; he underestimates the Warriors of my City. Violence, as MLK notes, always begets violence. Even if conflict accelerated to a challenge and Vof had won (and he might well have, but I cannot say; at that point, it would have been a quite different kind of fight...and Vof might himself had backed down when the Ubar stood up for the girl) it would have been an outrage. I might myself have taken the field against Vof, a man I consider Brother over all others in Gor. There were other men present who would likely have dropped him with bows after he took down the Ubar. And if that did not happen, his little Northern sim, for all their pride, might well have been raided by a large force who does raiding combat and raid defense every single day. What a bloody, bloody, mess. I could no longer have spoken up for him as Brother to my own fellow Finians. It would have been between my new City and him....you see, what he was doing was not thought through in its impact to me.

Course, I cannot read the Ubar's mind; he might have found the whole thing funny or simply great rp and rolled with it, not seeing what Vof was doing as an insult at all, but simply the correct Gorean male thing to do.

Human beings are at some level sexual animals, and dominance may be attractive in various ways, but we are also rational animals, in my view also spiritual animals, and those two things completely change how we must manage our animal selves (for that part surely persists in us all).

Well, I have made similar mistakes myself.

This goes out, as the last, unedited and as is. Sorry, but as an English guy, have to do the disclaimer.

Further Thoughts on Gor, etc.

First, I am sorry, Hotspur you have felt the bloom has come off the Rose in Caledon; I know at least part of why you feel this way H; I saw just some of the posts (you yourself never spoke to me about it ) and well, if it were me, I would have handled things with a lot less decorum. Sorry if that pisses anyone off, but there it is.

As for spellfire, it uses an ejected damage prim. You MUST hit CTRL N to see the prim (CRTL ALT T works but is confusing as hell). Then, somehow, those who know sf well know how to dodge the ejected prim. What my good friend Jot Zenovka (a master who kicks my ass every time) can do is somehow use what she calls "Evasion" or some such thing....she can dodge the prim with some very subtle movements. In short, none of my Gorean training helps me much; I can be swinging right at her and missing while she is nailing me. I don't like SF, but after sparring with her yesterday, I have more respect for those who use it and am considering taking it up more deeply myself. I still give Imrath Tir a thumbs up; great group of people, good rp, very tolerant place.

Things in Fina are going fine, so far (grins at the pun). The Men have been cool to me, everyone has, really, even though I have no idea how to do even the most basic of things that rp sims do. Tland was all about the Arena....when rp enters the mix, it gets very, very complicated. I have never used a chain and collar, or bound a captive, etc. The list goes on for a long ways. Also, I have not been captured, and that day may prove tricky because of my rp limits. The captives I have been given charge of guarding I have treated well...and in my usual chaste manner, which I think has disappointed one or two (okay, maybe Tele overflatters self).

I did see an execution the other day...the girl was a panther, a fighter, a captive, and was doing everything she could to get her captor to kill her, frankly, including head butt his groin. She didn't want to hang around as a captive any longer (and I understand her sentiment). But there are all these bizarre rules....killing someone must take at least five lines of text, for one. That way you can't just say: "you're dead!" So you have to drama it up. And the Warrior did: something about severing both carotids and the windpipe...a quick death, a merciful death actually (he could have crucified or impaled her or some such thing) but just seeing that in writing really chilled me. I don't know how I would have handled it. I know it's avatar role play, but anyway, point made.

Otherwise, the guys are amazing fighters. I was considered tough in Torvic, one of the very best, I'm a medium fish in Fina. And to answer Hotspur's question, I think you could come spar in the Arena H...you could certainly wear an observer tag and explore. I could introduce you as my friend, if you wished. Fina is large, complex, hierarchical, and deep, deep in rp. Very unlike the old Tland. I am just the new guy whom everyone says has such nice manners! Hah! I do have to say, Tland had a much better Arena system....the same one in the Cay. But they do have a free sword in Fina and I think they welcome visitors who are respectful of their customs. But of course they are paranoid; we have to be! Scouts, spies, assassins....they come daily. Daily. The City is raided often by people who do very awful things to their captives, sometimes.

Anyway, that's it for now. I hope to do a bit more fantasy rp as Jot teaches me the way SF works...I think I can do a bit of both worlds. I still love my home in Caledon (my third world); it is amazing, really, but have no idea what to do with it and am still not sure if the pirate thing will get off the ground (of course, I could hold a tourney in the Loch anyway....and people would come...why haven't I thought of that). Perhaps when the weather cools I will want to stroll as a gentleman again and flirt with the Ladies.

Well, must go. This is speedblog. Thanks to all for reading. My love to each. And I still miss many I used to see more in Caledon: Vid, Dia, H, Eva, Sera...a longer list. Be well. Safe paths. Odin be near. All that.

Tele

Hello to Dear Friends....and Tele is Back in Gor

I ignore this blog so much I did not even think to check for comments, and there were four on the last post alone! My sincere thanks to all who post here...as rarely as I post myself, I am quite pleased anyone reads this at all.

And while I am in world less (clearing my "defensible space" around my mountain house...lots of cutting and hauling, etc.) I have in fact rejoined a Gorean sim. My return to sl Gor has rather an odd twist: after much cajoling and very kind suggesting (begging) on the part of Cinde Fate, I found myself joined to Torvic Pass, a Gorean sim risen out of most of the population of my original sim, Torvaldsland.

I had mixed feelings about joining; partly because I had left Tland, mostly because I didn't think I'd ever rp in Gor again. But as I became more and more disappointed with spellfire, the meter system used in Imrath Tir, the fantasy sim I roleplayed in (and what wonderful people and values are represented there)....I mean, I really, really hate spellfire. It works by ejecting a rectangular shaped damage prim from the center of your av, no matter your weapon. So axe fighting or sword fighting is really just throwing bricks at people. Some people, some very skilled fighters, like it, but I found I was not one.

And so, back to Torvic Pass for my combat rp (as we still have not managed to get this off the ground in Caledon, and I have always been reticent to inject such a large change to the Caledonian System (CalSys for short) I started hanging out with my old friends in Torvic. Mostly, Torvold/Brutis. The sim was trying to go into full combat rp, unlike my other Gorean sim which only did tourneys, and I was curious.

Enter drama. Enter money. Exit sim.

The week I joined half the sim left over what I still consider to be insufficient reasons as far as I know them (and much I do not know). But I saw how some of them left, and was not much impressed. Then about four weeks later they simply announced that TP was closing: they had bought two sims (I don't know why, when they could barely float one) and the tier was not manageable even with the few of us about kicking in a little. I packed up my things, and wondered what to do next.

As before, a few of those who had left had joined another sim; one of the Free Women there was and is starting her own, but these were not my old friends, these were people I barely knew who had walked away from my old friends (some of them I have known since my rubber hair days). That option was quickly ruled out. Then I remembered how well Cornelius Tal had handled himself at the Relay for Life last year....walking out in front of all those strangers and announcing his name and cause...I was impressed. I saw he had some assocations with a sim called Fina. And also a man I met once in Tland long ago who was very good with the old Laura sword, Jake Molinaro. Here, I thought, are two guys I like (I also looked up Blue Conovor) and two of them say they are connected to Fina. I check the Map, see that Fina is part of an entire Continent, in full role play (with a continent full of enemies and allies, surely) talked to Jake and signed up that night.

I even entered their Tourney Saturday, using their own scripted sword (went out in the first round, lost, won, and then lost, but to a very good fighter...think I did pretty well). Overall, this seems like a good group of people. Am I fully Gorean, or do I embrace all of Gor? No, and I said so on my application. Meaning, I desire no bondmaid or slave and will own no one; also, I still rp chaste regardless (the first time panthers catch me, and they are known for rape, we will see how that plays out, but I will not budge on that rule).

Have I seen cruelty? So far, just once, with a captured outlaw who probably was not the one we were looking for...but then we just threw him off the bridge to drown. The first time I see somebody's av impaled or some other such thing, a true Enemy of the City, well, that may be difficult.

But I remind myself we are talking about avatars here, everyone there knows the score, and I'll take it one day at a time.

However, I get a chance to train with some of the best fighters I have met in all of sl, using the best weapons I know in sl. And there is something very clear cut about sl Gor: each Man really is Ubar (or King) in his circle of Steel; my skill with the Blade sets my limits. The only sad thing is that, as in most all of sl Gor, the bow is the preferred weapon for combat (simply because you can run and shoot and it's hard to hit someone with a bow with an axe, say). That, to me, is a great loss. There should be much stronger restrictions about bow use in place; that was something Aragon had right in Torvic. In time, maybe.

But for now, I'm surrounded by guys who are mostly better with the blade than I am. And there is a sense of Honor, and Brotherhood, and stark Reality to sl Gor that I missed during my time away. Honor really is sacred.

The books, you know, were meant as a fantasy excursion into exploration of Honor in that sense, and as sexual fantasy material for those who enjoy a little "forced" fantasy. I have only read two; that was enough (I hope I am not asked to read more for they are not very good and I cannot detach myself from scenes where captured women, one day crying for their homeland, become multi-orgasmic when stimulated by their captors). I did not live in the world of the Iliad. I do not know what Briseis' experience truly would have been (Achilles' famous slave, taken by Agamemnon). But I do not think it would have been that. Actual slavery, the taking of human beings as property in warfare, can never have been good for the human soul...on either side (and Frederick Douglass' remarkable narrative comes to mind on this point). But as I said, that is not my interest in sl Gor. Their sense of loyalty to the Homestone, of Brotherhood, of Honor, their constant honing of combat skills...even the decorum of the Free Women and the silly flattering of the bondmaids....well, all that is rather charming for an hour or two on a free summer morning. The thrill of being in actual combat rp is quite real, at least so far. I am sure all who read know what I think of actual war, war in real life...a thing of absolute last resort. Likewise cruelty in any form. I find none of it romantic. I find nationalism, even patriotism, must be embraced with a constant critical eye towards individual human rights; no government is worth praise that denies these.

And so, in sl Gor, I get fantasy...which is what second life is really about. People read Lord of the Rings with almost religious fervor (including me) for a spate of reasons; but one of them surely is the clear black and white....orcs can be killed all day, aggression released, without worrying about the feelings of the orc, or its family or friends left behind. They are just evil. Some part of human nature yearns for that kind of moral clarity, as a part of us (at least most men, and some women) crave release for the aggressive instincts which in some cases, now and in our long evolutionary history, have kept us alive!

Sl Gor is not Tolkien. Indeed, some of the Tolkienish sims can be a little, oh, what is the word: airy. No, sl Gor is quite down to earth, and so far at least, I can put up with what I do not like for that part which I do like.

I will also note (for any who have read tis meandering and unedited post this far) that actual Pirates are forming in Caledon, under Dirk Schwarz at least. He and I have discussed various meters. With the help of a couple of void sims (we truly cannot raid Vic City, or some such) I think a couple of Pirate bands could well form (perhaps one could insist they have letters of marque....call themselves the Privateers of Caledon..grins) and actual rp combat may well begin. Many have expressed interest in learning weapons and using them. To me and to others. Do not hold yourselves back! Go to Harbinger's, get a few things to fight with, and talk to Mr. Schwarz or myself about metering systems....they are all free and we have several choices. If this kind of activity begins, my interest in Caledon may rekindle. I know many lovely people there, but I am just not much of a tea and crumpet guy, and my schedule makes it hard for me to make the balls, etc., which I find fun but emotionally exhausting.

Well, regardless, I still live in Caledon (for now, at least). My associations there remain. But Adventure is a good thing, and for the moment I am finding it in Fina, a wonderfully built and highly trafficked City with lots of action. I cannot predict the future. What I do know is that I have made real friends other places, Caledon included, and miss them.

Any who are interested in the Pirate thing, contact me, Dirk, Elle, Vid, maybe Dia (her Grace)...I know there are others! The idea of fighting (ah, losing time to time) is scary at first, but really, it is all good fun.

Lastly, I am surprised how many Caledonians I run into in Gor....you know, in the IM all of a sudden..."oh, you are Sir Tele...I've heard of you," "nice to meet you Miss so and so" when a moment before it was all Tal, little one....etc. Chuckles.

Anyway, must go. More housework and yardwork to do than I care to say. My sincere, sincere, love to all. Caledon remains my port in any real storm.

Tele